The holidays compress everything. More family contact, more social events, more financial pressure, more reminders of how things used to be. For someone in recovery, that compression creates real risk. Substances are more present at gatherings, emotions run higher, and the gap between what the season is supposed to feel like and what it actually feels like can be disorienting.
Gratitude won’t eliminate those stressors. But practiced consistently through the season, it can change how you move through them.
Why the Holidays Are Hard in Recovery
No one can entirely escape stress during the holidays. Along with the sparkling lights and shiny packages comes lots of pressure to keep up with the added tasks of the season. These often don’t have to have anything to do with shopping, wrapping or decorating. Consider these holiday stressors:
- Additional family gatherings: For someone in recovery, these family events can add to the stress of the season.
- Navigating triggers: Attending work parties or gatherings with friends can expose you to substances.
- Financial burden: Extra holiday-related expenses can cause financial stress.
What Gratitude Does in This Context
Gratitude works during the holidays the same way it works year-round, but the stakes are higher and the results tend to be more immediate.
- It interrupts the resentment cycle. Resentment builds fastest when you’re focused on what others have, what you’ve lost, or what you’re missing. Gratitude pulls attention in the opposite direction. The two states compete, and you get to choose which one you feed.
- It keeps you present. Anxiety about holiday events tends to be about the future: what might happen, how a conversation might go, whether you’ll be able to handle a particular gathering. Gratitude is a practice of noticing what’s in front of you now, the same attentiveness that mindfulness practices develop.
- It deepens connection. Expressing appreciation to the people around you, directly, in conversation or in writing, tends to reduce the distance that addiction created. Small expressions of thanks, repeated over the season, rebuild something.
Practical Ways to Use Gratitude Through the Season
The concept of gratitude refers to the state of feeling thankful and appreciative for the things in your life that are meaningful to you. Did you know that gratitude as an actual stress reducer has been scientifically demonstrated?
A study published in the peer-reviewed journal “Psychiatry” found that overall well-being scores on various assessments were much higher in participants who expressed gratitude versus those who were neutral.
Another study reviewed the effect of a grateful attitude on physical and mental health wellness. It found that stress hormones were 23% lower in those with a mindset of gratitude. According to Robert A. Emmons, a leading expert in the science of gratitude, “Gratitude reduces lifetime risk for depression, anxiety, and substance abuse disorders, and is a key resiliency factor in the prevention of suicide.”
Practical Ways to Use Gratitude Through the Season
Acknowledging the positive effects of gratitude, on both our mental and physical health, let’s now explore some ways we can increase gratitude and reduce holiday stress:
- Follow negative thoughts with positive ones: Instead of viewing the stress of the holidays through a negative lens, such as hating the idea of travel at this time of year, find something positive about it. So, something like, “Ugh! I hate going to airports during the holidays, but I must admit that it’s a great time to catch up on some reading.”
- Practice saying thank you: Expressing gratitude is like practicing any skill — it takes time to become good at it. The holidays are a great time to practice this skill — find opportunities to give thanks when someone does something kind or thoughtful. Look them in the eyes when you thank them, or write them a thank you note. If you are a spiritual person, thank your Higher Power for the gift of this person in your life.
- Practice mindfulness: This form of meditation can be done at any time of the day — it involves focusing on the present moment while taking in all five senses. When you practice mindfulness, you find yourself with a heightened awareness of the beauty of the season that is all around you, so it is easy to cultivate a grateful heart.
- Keep a gratitude journal: Sitting down and reflecting on the day can help you notice all the positive things happening around you. Maybe it was the powerful testimony of the newcomer at Alcoholics Anonymous that day or the boat parade complete with Christmas lights and Santa Claus that you’d attended with your kids that evening. Jot them down in your journal to memorialize these blessings.
The holiday season is fleeting and will be over before you know it. Why not embrace the good and minimize the not-so-good aspects of the season by focusing on gratitude?
Ashley Addiction Treatment, formerly Father Martin’s Ashley, is a nationally recognized nonprofit leader in integrated, evidence-based treatment for substance use disorders. Our programs are accredited by The Joint Commission, and result in frequent publications of ongoing research into effective treatment methodologies. We offer holistic care that encompasses the mind, body and spirit through inpatient and outpatient treatment, provide drug detox, relapse prevention plans, family wellness programs and a variety of other services tailored to each patient’s unique needs. Our driving principle — “everything for recovery” — reinforces our mission to transform and save lives through the science of medicine, the art of therapy and the compassion of spirituality, and is complemented by our philosophy of healing with respect and dignity. For information about our comprehensive programs, please call 866-313-6307.
